Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Fly Trap

My boyfriend once said "you can catch more flies with honey than you can with Dugaldo." This just after he had scored us a discount on the Body Worlds exhibit at the Arizona Science Center. By simply being nice to the girl at the counter and smiling, he successfully deflected the arched eyebrows, cocked neck and folded arms I had ready to demand a discount we didn't deserve. She must have mistaken his dimples for college I.D.s because we got in at the student price. It just isn't fair, while I have to use wit and trickery my boyfriend needs only to smile. And his good looks get him things he doesn't even ask for. Like this morning after a twelve hour drive home from San Francisco, I got my tired ass up to get him some coffee, well ok I wanted some too. 

Now what you are about to read may shock and offend all six of you, but the truth needs to be known and if at all possible my reputation redeemed with some explanation. Yes, I went into a Starbucks drive-through this morning and have been periodically indulging in the practice for some months now. Its been a long time since I left the siren behind both as a loyal barista and even longer as a consumer. Now I am an avid supporter of the local mom and pop places and they will forever be my dealers of choice. After a while though, you find yourself needing a break from the kitch and true passion for coffee that comes with a locally owned coffee bar. And that's when the green monster lures you back with conformity, convenience and cute baristas that flirt with you because it says to in the training manual. And for me there is something about having the dirty little secret of coming back, like hooking up with an ex, that makes my mochas taste almost... good.

Today while braving the perils of the drive-through line, I found myself trying to enter in through the wrong way, a problem I'm not to familiar with. While awkwardly trying to reposition myself before other vehicles took my spot, another car took my spot, well almost. The woman driving it noticed what I was doing and let me in. But soon after more and more cars piled up behind me and if I didn't let her in she'd never get a chance, not to mention she would have been in a lot of people's way. So I proceeded to let her in. Then I noticed she had a Texas license plate and immediately regretted my decision. But in the spirit of reaching across party lines I allowed myself to feel that I'd done the right thing. After about a 10 minute wait, she finally got to the counter to pay and I almost felt that she'd made eye contact with me through the side view mirror. She was pretty, with big brown hair and diva eyes and in that short moment of connection I realized I could really go for a cookie. Mmm... chocolate chip. The next moment she had her drink in the car and  was gone.

As I pulled up to the window, the barista asked "grande mocha and iced grande latte?" Yeah. "The lady in front of you says thank you, and she payed for your drinks!"

Cool. I totally didn't want to break my ten either. I hate when boyfriend is right. 

Sometimes. Maybe honey really is sweeter.


  1. That was nice of that woman! Most I ever get from people when I let them go before me in any situation is that look back as if saying "Ha ha, suckaaaa!" ;)

  2. So true about the Starbucks training manuels. As you're ordering, the baristas gush at you to the point where you expect them to invite you home to Christmas dinner or something. Then when you see them taking a break outside in the parking lot and smile at them, they look past you like you're not even there. It's so superficial. Oh, no...I feel another Annoying Post coming on! Thanks for the idea!

  3. I try to be as chipper as possible without venturing into obnoxious happy asshole terrority, and I feel like it never gets me too far. Although, (since Starbucks was such a presence in this blog) I made friends with a Starbucks barista and I haven't paid for coffee in four months. Even his coworkers give me free coffee now. :] But there always nice so I tip them my coffee allowance anyways. this is Jordan by the way. :]